May 25, 2006
Washington Blade

Local activists plan to counter ex-gay conference with two planned vigils
By Joshua Lynsen

Love Won Out, a controversial religious conference that espouses reparative therapy and encourages gays to change their sexual orientation, is coming to Maryland next month.

Sponsored by Focus on the Family, a conservative group founded by psychologist James Dobson, the June 10 event at Immanuel's Church in Silver Spring offers what promotional materials describe as "help for those struggling... with unwanted same-sex attractions."

Mike Haley, Focus on the Family's gender issues director, said the conference gives hope to gays, their families and friends.

"We agree with the gay activists that nobody would choose these feelings," he said. "Where choice is concerned is once you have these feelings, you can act on them, or you can walk away from them."

But local gay advocates said the conference's main theme -- that "change is possible" -- is countered by mainstream psychologists and psychiatrists. They pledged to counter the conference with two vigils.

Dan Furmansky, executive director of Equality Maryland, said the morning and afternoon vigils June 10 will occur across the street from Immanuel's Church.

"The goal is to provide concise and intelligent arguments in response to any media attention this gets," he said, "and to be there for any individuals who are going into the conference who would benefit from seeing a friendly face that accepts them for whoever they are."

The conference series, which began eight years ago and last came to the area in 2002, frequently draws protests from gay rights advocates. Furmansky said Equality Maryland worked with other groups to develop a measured response.

"It's very important to us as a coalition that this event bring no more publicity to Focus on the Family and their negative messages than they would otherwise receive," he said. "Our response should be proportionate to the level of attention the actual event receives."

David S. Fishback, a local gay activist who has two gay sons, said the counter-message will focus on acceptance.

"It is sad that there are some people that are so caught up in their own theology that they feel the need to tell people, particularly young people, that they must choose between their religious faith and being true to how God made them," he said. "That's very sad."

Furmansky said his group would also emphasize that all major medical professional associations have "condemned the conversion therapy that Love Won Out suggests."

The American Medical Association officially "opposes the use of 'reparative' or 'conversion' therapy that is based upon the assumption that homosexuality per se is a mental disorder or based upon a prior assumption that the patient should change his or her homosexual orientation."

That policy -- designated H-160.991 -- has been challenged by Focus on the Family. Haley said policies by the AMA and the American Psychological Association are "not based on fact, or empirical data."

"Both the AMA and the APA have high regard for what's called self-determination," he said, "and support that for men and women who want to take it."

The APA Code of Conduct considers self-determination, the idea that people can create the lives they want, as important as patient privacy.

Haley, who identified as gay for 12 years but now considers himself a heterosexual, said Love Won Out is an opportunity for people to hear about self-determination, and its relevancy to same-sex attractions.

"We have to look at the fact that, for those who are highly motivated, change is possible," he said. "It's not an option that everyone wants to take."

Furmansky, however, said Love Won Out is a thinly veiled attempt to convert gays.

"I think that this conference is a perpetuation of Focus on the Family's noxious anti-gay message," Furmansky said. "There's no such thing as preventing homosexuality -- just obstructing people's souls."

Fishback said the conference's strong religious overtones are improper.

"They say that they are just following the word of God as written in scripture," he said. "In reality, there are no biblical literalists in our society -- or very, very few.

Fishback said he and other gay advocates also oppose Love Won Out because parents often bring their gay children in an attempt to convert them.

"I think it's sad because it's not going to help anyone," Fishback said, "and it may hurt people."

Tied to school debate?

Love Won Out will hold its June 10 conference in Montgomery County, where school officials are debating how to update its health curriculum.

Liberty Counsel, along with Parents & Friends of Ex-Gays & Gays, last year sued the school district for excluding information about ex-gays in the revised curriculum. The organizations also complained the new curriculum for students in grades eight and 10 "normalized homosexuality."

Furmansky said it's no coincidence that Focus on the Family chose to hold the conference in Montgomery County.

"Clearly, a primary goal of Focus on the Family is ensuring the facts about sexual orientation are not taught in schools," he said. "Given the high profile debate about Montgomery County's health curriculum, the transparency is obvious."

Haley, however, said the conference wasn't organized in response to the curriculum debate. He noted it takes about two years to plan an event after the invitation to speak is accepted.

"Inevitably, it seems like something comes up," Haley said. "This just was happenstance that we were invited to come again, and we took the opportunity."

Regardless, Fishback said Montgomery County was an appealing target for Love Won Out even before the curriculum debate.

"I think that I could understand why they would want to go into a community that is so accepting of people that are gay," he said. "Montgomery County is a place that embraces people in their community."

For its last local appearance in 2002, Love Won Out sought to advertise the event in the Blade. That ad was rejected by William Waybourn, who was then-president of Blade publisher Window Media, because he said the ad made unproven medical claims.

Christopher Norfleet, a Focus on the Family spokesperson, said the organization is not planning to advertise next month's conference in the Blade or any other local publication.